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¡°I¡¡can't¡¡believe¡¡you¡¡tell¡¡people¡¡your¡¡age,¡±my¡¡friend¡¡commented.

¡¡¡¡Hey,¡¡I¡¡don't¡¡mind.¡¡Really.¡¡In¡¡fact,¡¡I¡¡love¡¡my¡¡age,¡¡because¡¡every¡¡single¡¡birthday¡¡means¡¡more¡¡than¡¡just¡¡presents¡¡and¡¡chocolate¡¡cake.

¡¡¡¡The¡¡day¡¡I¡¡heard¡¡the¡¡word¡°cancer¡±spoken¡¡by¡¡my¡¡doctor,¡¡my¡¡life¡¡turned¡¡upside¡¡down.

¡¡¡¡¡°I¡¡have¡¡a¡¡test¡¡on¡¡Monday,¡±I¡¡said¡¡foolishly,¡¡thinking¡¡that¡¡the¡¡doctor¡¡would¡¡postpone¡¡surgery¡¡so¡¡I¡¡could¡¡ace1¡¡my¡¡humanities¡¡test.¡¡What¡¡I¡¡didn't¡¡realize¡¡is¡¡that¡¡I¡¡was¡¡preparing¡¡for¡¡the¡¡biggest¡¡test¡¡of¡¡my¡¡life.

¡¡¡¡Within¡¡hours¡¡I¡¡discovered¡¡that¡¡I¡¡did¡¡have¡¡cancer.¡¡It¡¡had¡¡spread¡¡to¡¡my¡¡lymph¡¡nodes2.¡¡I¡¡learned¡¡at¡¡32¡¡years¡¡of¡¡age¡¡to¡¡face¡¡mortality3.¡¡Every¡¡time¡¡the¡¡doctors¡¡entered¡¡my¡¡room,¡¡they¡¡walked¡¡in¡¡with¡¡bad¡¡news¡¡and¡¡one¡¡more¡¡specialist.¡¡One¡¡white¡¡coat¡¡meant¡¡cancer.¡¡Two¡¡white¡¡coats¡¡meant¡¡chemo4.¡¡Three¡¡meant¡¡radiation.¡¡Four¡¡meant¡¡detection¡¡of¡¡another¡¡possible¡¡tumor¡¡5.

¡¡¡¡At¡¡one¡¡point¡¡five¡¡doctors¡¡stood¡¡around¡¡my¡¡bed.¡¡It¡¡seemed¡¡fitting¡¡because¡¡the¡¡statistics¡¡dropped¡¡to¡¡a¡¡10%¡¡chance¡¡of¡¡surviving¡¡five¡¡years.¡¡One¡¡doctor¡¡for¡¡each¡¡year¡¡I¡¡might¡¡live.

¡¡¡¡There¡¡were¡¡a¡¡multitude¡¡of¡¡6¡¡reasons¡¡to¡¡stick¡¡around¡¡7ª²ª²a¡¡husband¡¡of¡¡12¡¡years¡¡that¡¡I¡¡loved¡¡a¡¡whole¡¡lot¡¡and¡¡three¡¡beautiful¡¡children¡¡that¡¡were¡¡clueless¡¡to¡¡the¡¡plight8¡¡of¡¡their¡¡mom¡¡and¡¡dad,¡¡but¡¡who¡¡gave¡¡me¡¡daily¡¡strength¡¡in¡¡their¡¡innocent¡¡love¡¡and¡¡handmade¡¡gifts¡¡that¡¡hung¡¡on¡¡the¡¡hospital¡¡wall.

¡¡¡¡To¡¡this¡¡day,¡¡I¡¡still¡¡have¡¡a¡¡crayon¡¡picture¡¡of¡¡me¡¡resting¡¡in¡¡bed,¡¡with¡¡a¡¡large¡¡head¡¡and¡¡larger¡¡lips,¡¡with¡¡a¡¡thermometer¡¡1¡¡sticking¡¡out¡¡of¡¡my¡¡mouth.¡¡The¡¡words,¡°get¡¡well¡¡so¡¡u¡¡can¡¡com¡¡home¡±was¡¡my¡¡mantra2.

¡¡¡¡I'm¡¡thankful¡¡for¡¡cancer¡¡in¡¡many¡¡ways.¡¡Does¡¡that¡¡sound¡¡crazy?¡¡I¡¡wouldn't¡¡wish¡¡it¡¡on¡¡anybody¡¡and¡¡I¡¡don't¡¡want¡¡to¡¡go¡¡through¡¡it¡¡again,¡¡but¡¡it¡¡was¡¡a¡¡teacher.¡¡It¡¡helped¡¡me¡¡to¡¡treasure¡¡every¡¡single¡¡day.¡¡It¡¡forced¡¡me¡¡to¡¡prioritize3¡¡my¡¡life.¡¡Things¡¡that¡¡were¡¡once¡¡important¡¡seemed¡¡foolish.¡¡It¡¡pushed¡¡me¡¡off¡¡the¡¡rolling¡¡wheel¡¡this¡¡society¡¡calls¡¡sacred¡¡and¡¡let¡¡me¡¡pursue¡¡the¡¡desires¡¡of¡¡my¡¡heart,¡¡instead¡¡of¡¡my¡¡wallet.¡¡It¡¡gave¡¡me¡¡the¡¡ability¡¡to¡¡see¡¡life¡¡as¡¡fragile,¡¡not¡¡one¡¡day¡¡promised.¡¡It¡¡allowed¡¡me¡¡to¡¡treasure¡¡my¡¡three¡¡beautiful¡¡children,¡¡who¡¡sometimes¡¡brought¡¡heartª²

¡¡¡¡ache¡¡along¡¡with¡¡joy¡¡as¡¡they¡¡grew¡¡up,¡¡who¡¡are¡¡all¡¡now¡¡in¡¡college¡¡and¡¡can¡¡now¡¡spell¡¡beautifully.

¡¡¡¡When¡¡I¡¡hit¡¡my¡¡5th¡¡year¡¡of¡¡survival,¡¡I¡¡left¡¡my¡¡job¡¡to¡¡write¡¡full¡¡time.¡¡I¡¡decided¡¡not¡¡to¡¡write¡¡one¡¡more¡¡word¡¡about¡¡anything¡¡that¡¡didn't¡¡matter¡¡to¡¡me.¡¡It¡¡was¡¡a¡¡step¡¡of¡¡faith,¡¡but¡¡it¡¡made¡¡perfect¡¡sense.¡¡Cancer¡¡taught¡¡me¡¡not¡¡to¡¡let¡¡the¡¡opportunities¡¡of¡¡your¡¡heart¡¡pass¡¡you¡¡by¡¡because¡¡we¡¡are¡¡not¡¡promised¡°one¡¡day¡±or¡°someday.¡±

¡¡¡¡On¡¡my¡¡40th¡¡birthday,¡¡I¡¡rode¡¡gocarts4¡¡with¡¡30¡¡of¡¡my¡¡closest¡¡friends¡¡to¡¡celebrate.¡¡The¡¡numbers¡¡4ª²0¡¡hanging¡¡across¡¡the¡¡wall¡¡were¡¡a¡¡beautiful¡¡sight.

¡¡¡¡I¡¡celebrated¡¡my¡¡10th¡¡year¡¡of¡¡survival¡¡on¡¡a¡¡boat¡¡in¡¡the¡¡Amazon¡¡in¡¡the¡¡rainforest¡¡of¡¡Brazil.¡¡I¡¡sat¡¡on¡¡the¡¡top¡¡level¡¡and¡¡watched¡¡the¡¡sun¡¡rise¡¡and¡¡from¡¡somewhere¡¡so¡¡deep¡¡inside,¡¡I¡¡thanked¡¡God¡¡for¡¡the¡¡opportunity¡¡to¡¡experience¡¡life¡¡through¡¡facing¡¡death.

¡¡¡¡You¡¡see,¡¡life¡¡has¡¡become¡¡a¡¡series¡¡of¡¡celebrations.¡¡Last¡¡month,¡¡I¡¡celebrated¡¡my¡¡13th¡¡year¡¡of¡¡survival¡¡and¡¡embraced¡¡my¡¡44th¡¡birthday.¡¡Next¡¡month,¡¡Richard¡¡and¡¡I¡¡will¡¡celebrate¡¡our¡¡24th¡¡anniversary.¡¡Leslie,¡¡my¡¡oldest,¡¡turned¡¡21¡¡last¡¡year.¡¡My¡¡twins¡¡are¡¡20.¡¡All¡¡young¡¡adults¡¡now,¡¡all¡¡running¡¡after¡¡their¡¡own¡¡dreams,¡¡because¡¡my¡¡bout1¡¡with¡¡cancer¡¡taught¡¡them¡¡too.

¡¡¡¡I¡¡look¡¡at¡¡my¡¡friend¡¡and¡¡answer¡¡her¡¡question.¡¡Do¡¡I¡¡mind¡¡telling¡¡my¡¡age?¡¡Absolutely¡¡not.¡¡I'll¡¡shout¡¡it¡¡from¡¡the¡¡rooftops2.¡¡I'm¡¡44!¡¡I'm¡¡thankful¡¡for¡¡all¡¡10¡¡gray¡¡hairs.

¡¡¡¡When¡¡I¡¡look¡¡in¡¡the¡¡mirror¡¡and¡¡notice¡¡the¡¡small¡¡lines¡¡appearing¡¡around¡¡my¡¡mouth¡¡and¡¡eyes,¡¡I¡¡don't¡¡call¡¡them¡¡wrinkles.¡¡I¡¡call¡¡them¡¡opportunities.

¡¡¡¡Every¡¡line¡¡was¡¡placed¡¡there¡¡by¡¡a¡¡smile¡¡that¡¡creased¡¡my¡¡faceª²ª²an¡¡experience,¡¡large¡¡or¡¡small,¡¡that¡¡came¡¡from¡¡living¡¡this¡¡gift¡¡called¡¡life.(by¡¡T.¡¡Suzanne¡¡Eller¡¡)
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